Some tweets I would send if I had access to Twitter from work

You know what’s awesome? When you’re already swamped and someone sends an email to 40 people telling them to call you right away. AWESOME.

I have been up hours past my bedtime for the past 5 nights. Saying I’m exhausted would almost be a lie. I’m practically in a walking coma.

How to tell you’re a parent, item 26,000: You regularly pick someone else’s nose without any qualms. Parenting is so glamorous!

One of the great things about moving is welcome to the neighborhood cookies from new neighbors. Yum!

Have spent approximately 2 hours today thinking about BBQ brisket. May be a teensy bit too obsessed with food.

Maybe should have been more specific in my wish for a lawn mower/house warming present. Mom hired someone to mow my lawn twice. Still nice.

Lessons learned from office Olympics: I suck at throwing paper airplanes, shooting rubber bands, and have a pointy head.

Need to buy a new wardrobe for Blogher. Hoping husband gets a promotion (somewhat likely) so I can go shopping!

All In

As of last night we're fully moved out of the apartment where we've lived for the past four years and into our very first house. I would post pictures, but the cord that attaches our camera to our computer is packed in a box I have yet to get unpack. I also have no clue which box it is. Saying I'm not great at packing would be a bit of an understatement. At least we did it and we're here, right?

Aaron and I are exhausted as are my dad, mom, sister, and best friend, all of whom helped us move. Aaron is bound to be even more exhausted tomorrow, as he's at the apartment right now finishing up all of the cleaning they asked us to do (which was a ton). I would have gone to help him, but he preferred to do it by himself instead of having help along with a baby there to drive him nuts. Gabbie is doing pretty well, but has been incredibly ornery and is driving him up a wall. Me too, but I have more patience these days (probably because I've gotten a small amount more sleep than he has.

The house, though, it's great. Gabbie loves to crawl from the dining room through the kitchen into the living room around to the hall and back to the dining room multiple times in one big loop. It is hard to keep up with her, especially when she's making laps using her walk-behind toy. We have to install gates on the stairs soon because she beelines for them as often as she can. Right now the boxes the gates are in are making excellent barriers to her getting on the stairs, but of course, aren't practical in the long run.

I'm loving the kitchen and the family room, the rooms I'm sure we'll spend the most time in throughout the years to come. The neighborhood is really quiet, and the neighbors are incredibly friendly so far. I'm really loving pretty much everything about this place, and I'm so far I'm definitely glad we decided to move here. 

I know this is all scattered, but like I said earlier, I'm exhausted. A good, satisfied kind of exhausted though. I still can't believe I'm a homeowner!

House Day

Well, this day has finally arrived. Today we close on our house! (And take on a huge amount of debt and responsibility - EEK!) When we started this process today seemed so incredibly far away, but now that we're here I realize how quick it all went. Less than a month ago we saw the house for the first time, agonized about putting in an offer on this one or another that we also liked, and came to the decision that this was the house; the one we plan on staying in, barring any job changes that take us away from the area, until our kids are grown, and possibly even after.

Wow, I kind of just freaked myself out with that one.

Anyway, so we close at nine (2 1/2 hours to go!), and then my plan is to go to Lowe's, pick up a Rug Doctor, and get cleaning at the new house. I've loaded my iPod up with back episodes of Wait, Wait don't tell me (and possibly a new CD, but don't tell Aaron), and I'm ready to go.

This is probably the 3rd most exciting day of my life, but I have to admit. I'm glad we're planning on staying in this house for a good long while. Another move may just kill me.

My Ode to Nursing Gabbie

The lactation consultant in the hospital noted right away, “She has a strong suck.” Then she told me how painful this might be to get used to, and oh was she right. For the consultant who taught the nursing class I took while 8 months pregnant: you were wrong. It does hurt at first, even if you are doing it right. The first few times Gabbie latched on, I de-latched her thinking she didn’t have it quite right. After all that de-latching we had to train her to latch again, despite the fact that she had it right the first time. I had it wrong, and I still feel guilty about that.

Breastfeeding is one of the hardest, most stressful and guilt-inducing things I’ve ever done. I worried constantly about whether she was getting enough. At almost three weeks I thought we had it down, things were going better. Then my supply went into overdrive and we had a whole new set of problems. Add to that the fact that Gabbie has never nursed well when there are other things going on in the room and a weekend trip to my parents and I got mastitis on my left side. I woke up to a sun-burned looking breast and the chills despite the fact I was sweating because I was so feverish.

She would cry every time I tried to latch her on, and so would I. It would take 30 minutes just to get her to eat and then she’d fall asleep after three minutes of nursing. This lasted for more than 6 weeks, and I thought I was going to lose it. Still, I persevered. Once I started back to work and she started daycare, it got somewhat easier. She missed me, and so now she was nursing for comfort as much as for food. As time passed, we got better and better. I still stressed out about it all the time – was she getting enough? Was she nursing often enough to keep up my supply?

She got teeth and one day she bit me. I sat her down on the ground so fast (but still gently) that it startled her. It scared her even more when I walked away crying. I was scared too; scared to let her nurse again in case she did that horrible thing to me again. Scaring her a bit seems to have worked, though. She only bit me one other time, and I kind of deserved it for trying to nurse her when she wasn’t interested.

Gabbie turned a year old and we started weaning. She had her last bottle last week, and now I only nurse her in the evening and the morning. After all of the hard times and frustrations and worry, I’m still sad to be almost done. She nurses less and less every week; now it’s more of a comfort thing than a food thing. I stopped worrying about my supply. If it’s there, great, if not, oh well. Now we’re just enjoying it. I get the feeling we’ll be finally and truly done when I go to Blogher at the end of next month.

Even though it was hard and I wanted to quit a million times, I’m glad I stuck with it. And strangely, even though it was hard and I wanted to quit a million times, I can’t wait to do it again with our next baby, whenever he or she comes. It wasn’t always (or even often) the starry-eyed, mother-baby bonding experience we all probably imagine, but it was ours and I wouldn’t change a thing.

Father's Day, Preemptively

Being able to be a parent alongside my husband is one of my favorite things. He’s an absolutely awesome dad and has been from moment one. Not too long ago he confessed to me that before Gabbie was born he was terrified. He didn’t know what to do, how to handle babies, how he was going to handle being so responsible for someone else. Then, as she was born and placed on my chest all of these fears melted away, and all he wanted was his turn to hold his beautiful, wonderful baby girl. He said it was hard to be patient, but also knew that I had first dibs what with the pushing her out and stuff. Even though he had never held a baby before, he was a natural. He changed all of her diapers in the hospital and cuddled her as much as he could. Definitely a proud papa.

All along he’s shared equally in all the hard work of being a parent. He changes all types of diapers, even taking the stinkiest ones so I won’t have to deal with them. He gives her baths, gets her ready in the morning, is in charge of dispensing medicine, and even regularly gets up with her in the middle of the night. I’m so thankful to have a partner who is as interested in all the hard work as he is in the fun times, and I definitely realize how lucky I am.

We’re both constantly amazed at how much we love her, and even though it is hard (really hard) work to be a parent, it’s also more fun than we’ve ever had before. Watching Aaron and Gabbie together is pure pleasure for me. The sound of their laughter when they’re wrestling on the floor is a delight, and she often instigates because she finds it so much fun to tumble around. One of my favorite sights is when they’re on the couch together, watching some sporting event, each with their snacks balanced on their laps, hands absentmindedly picking up a chip (him) or sweet potato puff (her) while concentrating on what’s happening. When he’s playing a video game and she’s awake, there’s nothing more she wants than to get in on the action. And it’s a testament to how much he loves her that he takes the batteries out of his second controller and lets her play with it, though even I am afraid she might break it.

I didn’t have this type of father-daughter relationship. My father died while my mom was pregnant, and she and my dad didn’t marry until I was nearly three. Even though we had a hard time getting along while I was growing up, and I respect and love my dad so incredibly much, we definitely didn’t have this. It’s wonderful that Gabbie is able to have this type of relationship with her dad and it delights me to no end to watch them build such a strong bond. 

Aaron deserves the very best Father’s Day for being the very best dad. I offered to get a babysitter so we could go out to a movie and to a steak dinner, but he declined. There’s nothing he’d rather do on Father’s Day than be a father, so we’re spending the day together as a family and getting in as much daddy-daughter time as possible. I wouldn’t want it any other way, and I’m so happy he feels the same.

Happy Father’s Day to the best dad I know. I love you!

Dance, Dance Gabbie

Last night I Twittered that there is nothing in the world better than watching Gabbie dance, and I absolutely believe that this is the truth. It’s adorable and hilarious, and we spend our evenings doing everything we can to get her to dance. She holds her arms out and bent at a ninety-degree angle and twists from side to side, then shakes her butt a little and bounces up and down. She even sings a little while she does it. She prefers rap or rap-like pop music to rock, something we’ll have to work on. Her favorite songs seem to be by Black Eyed Peas, Outkast, NERD, and Rhiana. However, the song that never fails to make her dance (and never fails to make me feel like a less-than-awesome mom) is the PBS Sprout On Demand theme song.

Back when we were getting her to try to put weight on her legs, just after she got out of her hip dysplasia brace, we would hold her hands while she stood and twist her back and forth while singing “Dance, Dance Gabbie”, a little three-word song we made up. She loved it, and would laugh riotously the entire time. She also loved, and still loves, when we would dance with her in our arms, bouncing and spinning along to whatever fast-paced song was on the radio (Love Shack is her absolute favorite). We’d spin, and she’d laugh. We’d jump, and she’d laugh. We got quite the workout most nights, dancing to get her to laugh. Now dancing serves the opposite purpose. We try to get her to dance so we can laugh, but it’s still just as much fun. We still get quite the workout, dancing right along with her and belly laughing.

The other day she was walking past the TV using her walk-behind toy while I was watching Ellen. Ellen’s DJ played Rhiana’s Shut Up and Drive when she gave away a car, and Gabbie stopped, shook her rear a few times, and then continued on her way. I? Nearly fell out of my chair laughing. This past weekend at my aunts’ house we put on some Michael Jackson, which she loved, and we watched, laughing so hard that tears streamed down our faces.

We’ve been trying to get her dancing on video, but she seems to not want to dance when the camera is out, so we’re going to have to find a way to trick her into dancing. I really hope she never stops doing this, even though I’m sure it will pass far too quickly, just like all the other cute things she does right now. This phase, like all the others that have passed so far, is my absolute favorite. It’s hard being a mom, wanting to freeze everything and yet being anxious to see what your baby does next. As long as she keeps on dancing, I’ll be happy. It really is the best thing that I’ve ever experienced. All of it.

Lists

My life is all about lists these days. I have lists of things we need for the house (dishwasher, garage door opener, shower curtain, new bathroom rugs…), lists of things to do to the house (clean carpets, paint Gabbie’s room…), and lists of things I want for the house (grill, compost bin, new curtains…). I have lists of things to pack, lists of things to throw out, and lists of things that can be moved into storage for right now, and many, many more.

And now, I have a list of my current favorite TV shows to share, because I am only able to think in lists these days.

• True Blood – I’m just starting season one, and Anna Paquin’s facial expressions are already grating on my nerves, but I can’t stop watching.
• Royal Pains – This new show on USA is pretty fun to watch. I like the premise of the concierge doctor, and the guy who plays the brother always makes me laugh no matter what show or movie he’s in.
• Harper’s Island – I keep thinking that the next episode is going to be the last, and then they manage to throw another twist my way and continue on. Very fun to watch, and it leaves me wishing I could watch the next episode immediately to find out what happens next.
• Next Food Network Star – I haven’t picked my favorite yet, but I was excited that Brett got kicked of, because he was starting to annoy the crap out of me. It did surprise me though, because he was getting the villain edit and they usually let the villain stay on a few episodes past when they should go.
• Top Chef Masters – Yet another reason why my diet is not going as well as I had hoped. This show is way fun, and the food looks delicious.
• Wipeout – The funniest thing in the world to me is watching someone fall. This show is full of people falling, so I laugh for about an hour straight. Add in the commentators and this is a laugh riot in our house.

I’m not going to have much time for tv in the next couple of weeks, but I think I’m going to have to find a way to squeeze these in if possible. Plus, there’s a good chance we’ll get HBO at the new place so I’ll be able to watch season 2 of True Blood as it airs (as long as I can catch up somehow too – I’m thinking On Demand should be awesome for this).

This post is totally not like me, I know

So, yeah. I have a bodily function issue to discuss today, and here we go: is it just us, or does everybody poop less while on vacation?

See, we were all worried because Gabbie didn't have a dirty diaper for two days when usually she has two a day. Then we got home and realized that she wasn't the only one that hadn't gone, and home is apparently the ultimate laxative, because the second we pulled in the parking lot, all three of us had to go (and only one of us had immediate relief via her diaper). 

It's just so weird to me. I mean, we eat more and worse than normal, so you would think that everything would at least be normal if not more than normal, but then nothing happens, and I never realize it until I get home. 

I guess the major lesson learned here is to ease up and not worry so much about Gabbie, because she's just being normal, or at least normal when compared to the rest of her family.

Also learned on vacation from everyone else? I have the cutest, funniest, smartest baby they've ever seen. I mean, seriously. Look at her:

Weekend Tripping

Do you want to know the worst/best reason to take a weekend trip? It’s when your grandma (who is nearly 90) calls you up and informs you that she’s moving to Oklahoma, and she knows that’s far away, so could you please come visit so she can see you one last time?

Heart? Broken.

So we’re off this weekend to go spend some time with her, and to let her spend some time with Gabbie, her first (and likely only during her lifetime) great-grandchild. I’m excited to head down, if not somewhat dreading the long ride in the car with a 1-year-old. We’ll see lots of relatives. Aaron and I will escape on Saturday or Sunday morning to have breakfast at our favorite breakfast restaurant, just the two of us. And we’ll get in as much time as possible with Grandma.

It’s been hard leaving after a visit with her for years. At that age, you don’t know when the last visit will be, but knowing that she’s starting to fade and she’s moving far away makes this even more likely to be the last visit. I’m going to be a wreck the whole way home, for sure. It feels like I just lost my other grandma, even though it’s been about a year and a half, and I’m not ready to lose another one. I know, I’m lucky to still have most of my grandparents alive, and it’s not something I take for granted, but I’m still not ready to lose them.

Scatter-brained and Stressed Out (to the max)

House-buying stress is starting to really get to both Aaron and I. Everything has actually gone pretty smoothly, but mortgage rates are getting us down (since they’re going up). We’re trying to wait it out, see if they go down before closing so we can lock in a better rate, but with closing currently set at two weeks from Friday, we’re getting nervous. It’s so bad that Aaron told me this morning he’s over buying a house and would just prefer to stay put forever. Unfortunately for him we’re under contract, have passed inspections, and have the mortgage application in, so it’s pretty much a done deal; we just need to get the financing in place and close, and we’re good to go.

On top of all of this fun, Gabbie is teething. She’s actually not too bad about it; just clingy and has a hard time sleeping, but one of the top front teeth poked its way through finally sometime yesterday. She was up every 1 ½ to 2 hours the past couple of nights and so the lack of sleep is not helping our stress level.

I was so stressed out I actually cleaned this morning, which is not normal for me. I just needed something to be orderly to make up for the lack of order I’m feeling. I feel completely out of sorts. I’m sure weaning is not helping this either – I feel like it’s throwing my hormones for a bit of a loop.

So, add it all together: money woes caused by mortgage rates + teething + weaning and you get me being all weepy and Aaron being all crabby and it’s not a good situation for any of us. I’m going to go eat the hell out of some Mexican food at lunch, not that stress eating is a good thing, but it’s what’s happening today. Then I’m buying Aaron a six pack on the way home and hoping as hard as I can that the Red Wings pull off the Stanley Cup win tonight so at least one thing goes well for him.

Reading back over this entry, it seems as scattered as I feel. Sorry about that, but it’s what you’re getting. Hopefully soon I’ll be able to bore you with house pictures and requests for redecorating opinions followed by befores and afters. That will be sooooo much better.

Tidbits

I’m currently waiting for our mortgage broker to get off his behind and call me back about what the heck is going on with locking us in at a good rate. It already rose a little since yesterday, and if he doesn’t get back to me soon it’s not going to be pretty. To say I’m a little stressed out about this whole thing would be a gross understatement. I think I’m driving everyone else nuts by how nuts I am. I did go to Zumba today and that helped a little. I only thought about house stuff every five to ten minutes instead of constantly. See? Vast improvement.

Seeing as I’m not accomplishing anything else this week, there’s very little to talk about. Unless you want to hear about what color bathroom rugs I’m choosing between, estimates on cost from different area carpet cleaners, light fixtures I’ve fallen in love with, or trying to figure out how to squeeze money for a grill out of our already tight budget. And don’t even get me started on paint colors.

Oh, hey! Did I mention we also bought a new car a couple of weeks ago? We did! It actually lowered both our monthly car payment and our insurance, so it was a good decision, even if buying a car and a house within the same month sounds a little bit crazy. (It totally is! Maybe that’s why I’m insane these days.) Anyway, we bought a Mazda 5 and I loooove it. It’s pretty blue, and my favorite part about it is that I can put Gabbie into her car seat without bending over and killing my back in the process. It’s right at the perfect level to just set her in. I do miss two things though that our last car (a Subaru Outback) had that this one doesn’t – heated seats (not missing these currently, but my tush will sure miss these come winter-time), and a little function that timed your trip. I don’t know why, but I used that thing all the time. This one has stereo controls on the steering wheel, gives me the ability to use my iPod through the stereo (once I buy the parts needed to connect it), and I can sit in the back seat with Gabbie, something I wasn’t able to do before.

All in all? Awesome.

In completely different news, I was having a little health problem that’s not for discussing among polite company, but suffice it to say that I went to the doctor, and the prescription includes me taking Metamucil every day for a month. Except I forgot to drink it last night. Which was fine, because – have you tasted that stuff? I bought the Pink Lemonade kind because I love lemonade, but my feelings for this stuff is the opposite of love. It’s tolerable, I guess, but what really has me bothered is a little warning label on the back. It tells you that if you don’t mix the powder with enough water, it may swell up and block your throat or esophagus, therefore causing you to choke.

!!!

So now, of course, I add way more than enough water and hide it up high in the cupboards, so that neither I nor Gabbie have even the remote possibility of choking to death on fiber powder. But dude! I never would have ever thought that was a possibility. So weird!

Finally, my mom is on a little trip right now to visit her dad, and had an interesting plane ride. First, it was interesting (in a non-fun way) because they turned the plane around halfway to the destination and landed back in Detroit (where she was flying out of). So, her flight took more than twice as long as she anticipated, which sucks because the airport where she was headed is way out of town from where my aunt lives, so it was a huge hassle. I would have been more than super annoyed. Secondly, though, it was pretty cool, because she rode with the guys from Sponge, one of my favorite bands back in high school. She said they were pretty fun, and at least something to distract her during the other travel annoyances.