Memar

When I was a toddler and just learning to speak I couldn't say, "Grandma" so I called my grandma, "Memar", and it stuck. Even as recent as last week I called her Grandma Memar (what her name morphed to as I got older).

We used to go visit my grandparents every spring break, once or twice a summer, and often for Thanksgiving or other long weekends. They used to live a lot closer then, and it was hard when they moved so much further away, because I got to see them so infrequently. The last time I made it down to Kansas City, in fact, was more than two years ago. When you're working and only have so many vacation days (and your husband has even less) it's hard to work in visits.

She said "Goodness, gracious!" and that's about as close to a swear-word she ever got even though most of her 8 kids have mouths like sailors. She wore the same bracelet every day that I knew her, a bracelet that my grandfather gave her when they were dating. When we were little there was a present drawer in her living room that she filled with toys and treats whenever we'd visit, and she always remembered what we all liked best. Despite being so prim and proper, she liked her bourbon (mixed with diet 7-up) and the highlight of her week was the happy hour party she and all her neighbors threw weekly at their clubhouse.

She's had health problems for a long time and has had breathing issues as long as I can remember. She had chronic pneumonia and went to the hospital on a fairly regular basis. That's why no one expected this visit to the hospital to be her last.

Grandma passed away yesterday morning. She was comfortable, pain-free, and went quietly in a hospice facility that treated her incredibly well and took care of her every need for the past week.

Rest in peace Memar. I know you're up in heaven where you belong. I'll miss you.